I have often mentioned that I can screw up the simplest of recipes. Today, I once again proved it.
Eggs in a basket must be one of the simplest recipes known to man: take a piece of bread, cut out the middle, butter both sides of the remainder, and put it in a pan. Turn on the stove, crack an egg into the centre, wait. After a while, flip it over. Wait some more. Take it out of the pan. Consume.
“How on earth could you screw this up?,” you might ask. You obviously haven’t known me long enough.
As I buttered the bread, I thought to myself, “Self, the bread’s already buttered. That’s grease. That means, logically, that I don’t need to grease the pan.” I shall now wait for the even-moderately-experienced cooks on my list to slap their foreheads and stare in awe at their screens, boggling at my stupidity. Go on; I’ll wait.
What will be obvious to them (but not, at the time, to me) was that the egg, the one I was going to be cracking into the pan, was not buttered.
The good news is that I managed to save both the pan and my dinner, though admittedly the bread was a bit burned and the kitchen a bit smoky for a few minutes.
Let it never be said I don’t bring entertainment into all your lives.